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lyallblacklupin · 3 years ago

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My other half.

Sirius is very upset because his other half, James Potter, has been taken away from him. The James who used to hold Sirius after a nightmare has Lily Evans in his arms one particular night, which angers Sirius a lot. He thinks that he has lost his friend. Little does he know, there is a certain perfect Marauder who understands him more than he understands himself.

“And then what I got to see was Evans! You just don’t care about your best friend anymore because of her!”

“Sirius, I can’t take care of you all the time! And I want you to be supportive here, be my best frien—“

“Whoa, whoa, what do you mean by ‘I can’t take care of you all the time’?” Sirius almost yelled at James, his chest heaving violently. James sighed and rubbed his temples.

“Pads, how many times I have to tell that Lily is now my girlfriend—“

“And what about me!?” Sirius knew that this was an unhealthy act of friendship and that was: Possessiveness. But he wanted to get this unsettling agitation off his chest that had been clinging him since the last night he had found Lily Evans buried in James’ embrace. Sirius had never felt so furious, and betrayed in his life. He wanted to lash out on his best friend, who was just like a brother to him. A non-biological brother who’d always been there for Sirius when his blood family sent him a shitty letters, and reassured him that he was not alone because the Potters were his family now, the same brother who’d been there to hold him when he had nightmares so he’d tuck him in his embrace and he could sleep a dreamless slumber till dawn, and then he’d go to his own bed. However, last night had been an exception, because the two brothers had an intervention after almost six years of inseparability, in the name of Lily Evans who had just started coming and going in their dorm, and Sirius felt like his privacy was assaulted.

“Sirius, don’t make this hard, please…” James flopped down on his bed, holding his head in his hands. Sirius hated that look because it reflected the exhaustion he was feeling, and it felt like a verification for Sirius that James was done taking care of him. Sirius knew that James had been taking extra care of him since they were eleven that even Remus and Peter had been annoyed and hated him for favoring Sirius more than he needed. Sirius didn’t want to feel like a child when he was a hopeless sixteen who didn’t have a girlfriend or anyone of his roommates to take constant of care of him. He knew that he was unfair with James. He knew that how much James wanted to date Lily Evans, and he also knew that he was being a pathetic friend and a mean brother to him for ruining his happiness by fighting him.

“Sirius?” James asked softly when Sirius was gazing hard on the floor, his mind in the trance of endless thoughts, and they just spiked up the guilt inside him.

But there was just this unnamed emotion of bitterness sitting at the top of his chest that denied him from acknowledging all of those facts about James Potter.

“It was the first nightmare I had without having you with me.” He blurted out, not looking at James at all. He believed that there was no one in the dorm except the two of them because if there were, he’d have been hearing gagging or huffing noises from the rest of the two marauders.

“Pads, I know. But what do you want me to do?” James’ voice sounded helpless.

“Nothing…absolutely nothing.” And with that, Sirius turned around to walk out of the dorm. He was reaching for the doorknob when his eyes side-caught Remus Lupin sitting on his bed, who had witnessed the entire conversation between them. Sirius thought his heart had stopped beating for a second. He fought back the embarrassment and scurried out of the room in a flash, hoping Remus hadn’t seen his flushed face.

Sirius spent his whole day with the rest of the Marauders, because James and Lily had gone to lake, hand in hand, together. He knew that James was giving him space. Peter was serving detention, so technically, Sirius got to hang out with the only Marauder and that was Remus Lupin.

Both of them were sitting under the tree. It had been an hour since they had been relishing the double free periods, and none of them had spoken a single word. Remus had a reason to stay quiet because he was reading a book of poetry, while Sirius was playing with the thorns of the grass, plucking and brushing them. It wasn’t like he didn’t have a reason to stay silent but because it was a ridiculous one that his best friend had finally gone out with the girl of his dreams, and he is being an absolute prat about it. Yeah, great one, Sirius! He internally mocks himself.

“Padfoot?”

Sirius praised himself that he didn’t yelp because he had almost believed that he was alone until Remus called him out.

“Moony?”

“You okay?” Remus’ amber eyes bored into him. Sirius had to look away for a bit. Remus Lupin was another story in his already chaotic life. In short, he was a mystery, even after he had revealed himself as a werewolf, who had a dying mother, and was miserably poor. Yet still, he was like a treasure residing in the depths of an island, and it never failed to tempt Sirius.

“Yeah, why?” He cleared his throat, but Remus was still gazing him.

“You are sulking.” Sirius could feel the smirk on his face without having to look.

“No, I am not.”

“I can tell.” He sighed, and Sirius thought he was done asking, and must have gone back to his book but he continued, “Your head is dangling low, your eyes are blinking a little too much, and your hands…well they don’t take a break from causing a wreckage like you are doing right now…”

Sirius looked down and saw that a palm-sized patch was created on the ground because of the plucking of grass. He looked back at Remus whose eyes were smiling more than his mouth.

“Congratulations, you just won the house cup for studying Sirius Black’ sulking postures.” Sirius said with a deadpanned face, and Remus laughed amusingly, putting away his book. It was a precious thing he did, because Remus rarely put his book away for anyone. Maybe Sirius was not just anyone for him.

They spent the afternoon talking and laughing, and Sirius felt warm and blissful to realize how much he enjoyed Remus’ company. He really underestimated him, and it made him feel all blue. He was gone back to sulking when James and Lily arrived for the dinner, while Remus was gone back to sit with Peter as usual.

The midnight was emerged upon Sirius as he had woken up from another nightmare. His vision was blurry, and he sat up on his bed. He was shivering and the covers were not helping him because he could feel the perspiration on his back and arms. James was sleeping alone because his curtains were not drawn shut, and Sirius was craving the human warmth but he wasn’t feeling right to go to him after their argument. He gathered his knees and pulled them close to his chest. He felt like crying because now he was recognizing that agonizing emotion inside him, and that was: Loneliness.

The reason he never had a proper relationship with a girl was because he never wanted to have a girl in his life. He had thought that his roommates were his only family, and they were the only ones he wanted to be with for the rest of his life. He loved them so much. He let his tears fall, and slipped into his cover again anyway, curled up in a ball. He knew that sleep was nowhere near him.

Just when he thought he could change into Padfoot, he heard the rustling sound of curtains. He felt alerted and, in all honesty, scared. He knew that his mind was deceiving him. They were just the aftershocks of the nightmares, but then he felt footsteps approaching. He squeezed his night shut. And then—

“Sirius?” It was not James.

“Moony?” Sirius turned around to find Remus standing in his pajamas. His hair were sticking out in every directions.

“Can I sleep with you?” His voice was hoarse, and he looked uncomfortable.

“Of course, you can. Hey, you okay?” Sirius scooted to make some space for him.

“Nightmares.” He replied, and it instantly broke Sirius’ heart.

They both laid together with a respectful distance, facing each other. Sirius could hear Remus’ teeth chattering. The half-moon’s light was landing on Remus, and Sirius could see his knuckles turning white as he fisted the blanket close to his chest. His eyes were screwed shut. Sirius was able feel every move of his body. He placed a hand on Remus’ cheek, and those amber eyes snapped open. Sirius decided that it was definitely the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Remus smiled weakly at him. He was reaching to hold Sirius’ wrist of that same hand before Sirius grabbed his shoulders, and shoved him in his embrace.

He thought Remus would protest. Instead, he melted. He buried his face in the crook of his neck, wrapping his own hands around Sirius’ waist, pulling him impossibly closer, while Sirius did the same by enveloping his torso by his own arms.

“I’m here for you, Pads.” Remus whispered in his skin, and it made Sirius smile.

“I’m here for you, too, Moony.”

Both of them fitted perfectly into each other’s bodies. After when they were relaxed in their positions, Sirius looked down to see the Remus sound asleep, a contenting smile tugging his lips, and suddenly that emotion of loneliness inside Sirius dissipated like it never existed.

#wolfstar #WOLFSTAR FLUFF #Wolfstar fanfiction #wolfstarendgame #remus x sirius #Sirius x Remus #SIRIUSxREMUS #Sirius Black #Remus Lupin #James Potter #Lily Evans #james and sirius #hogwarts #hp marauders #Harry Potter #peter pettigrew #hurt/comfort #nightmares #wolfstar supremacy

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writingtoforgetreality · 4 years ago

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I’m Only Me When I’m With You (Sam Wilson x Reader)

Request: Hello! Hope this ask finds you well! May I request a Sam Wilson x reader in which the reader is very stubborn but finds herself falling for Sam despite trying to resist those feelings? Thank you so much! I hope you stay safe and healthy during these crazy times! (by @agentmalfoy24601), [Marvel-Masterlist]

Summary: You liked Sam. Was it a secret? You hoped so but your team would state otherwise. While the teasing was funny & all, it actually made you distance yourself from your feelings even more. Luckily, there was a certain someone who could see right through you.

Words: 1,990

Warnings: language, feels, fluff, this is a cute one, I love Sam but barely anyone writes for him :(, slight TFATWS spoilers, (Y/E/C) = your eye color, REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

“Nope, forget it.” you argued with the three men in front of you. “I understand that this mission is important but I will not pretend to be his wife.” your finger pointed at Sam while your eyebrows raised.

“You could always pretend to be my partner.” Zemo reasoned. Shaking your head, you let out a scoff.

“(Y/N) & Zemo? Makes a cute couple.” Bucky spoke up & earned a death glare from not only you but also Sam. Though you did not see what Wilson was doing. Not in this moment.

“I hate every single one of you.” you snarled through gritted teeth.

“Sure.” Bucky mumbled almost inaudible, followed by a low chuckle.

The thing about this mission was that you knew if you played pretend next to Sam, it would not actually be pretending from your side. Truth was, you were falling for him. More than you would have liked to admit. You were not born yesterday, you were aware that relationships did not work out. Not with a job as dangerous as yours. Besides, this was Wilson you were talking about. Hell, he could have anyone, he would never choose someone like you. And you did not want him to choose you. Relationships complicated things. Complications led to danger & danger led to death. The rest of the team, especially Bucky, had picked up on the fact that you kind of liked Sam. And they teased the shit out of you. They even made bets on how long it would take the two of you to start dating. No way would you give in. Nope. That was not in your nature.

Though you had to admit that Sam did not make your plan of burying your feelings deep down any easier. Most of the times, he did not even realize the effect he had on you. It was simple things, really. The way he moved his body. How his shirts fit just right. This heartwarming smile of his that had you weak at the knees. His efforts to make you smile constantly, especially after failed missions. He was a good guy. And good guys never chose people like you. An acquaintance. That was what you were to him. Maybe it was for the better anyway.

“(Y/N)?” you heard Bucky’s voice coming from the closed door to your room. Jogging over there, you slowly opened it for him, checking if it really was him & not a threat or something. He entered after you stepped aside as a silent invitation.

“What’s up?” you were fixing up your appearance for the upcoming party you all had to attend. The outfit you wore made you feel like a strong goddess. The colors complemented perfectly, hugging every curve in the best way possible. It was not often when you got to dress up like that but when you did, it definitely paid off.

“Tell Sam you like him.” Bucky wasted no time with his words. Spinning around in order to face him, you gave him your best dumbfounded look. It made him roll his eyes. “I’m being serious.”

“How much money do you win if I do?” you asked curiously, knowing that this was most likely just part of one of their stupid bets.

“Zero, actually. Because I said you’d get together after this mission.” you gave him a look that he gladly ignored. “But that’s not the point…I do believe that the tension between you guys will be unbearable, though.”

“Oh, come on, dude. You’re totally exaggerating.” you gave an awkward chuckle to hide your embarrassment.

“I’m afraid I’m right.” he sat down on one of the chairs, then looked into your eyes. “I don’t know why you make such a big deal outta it. You like him. He likes you-“

“Which is not true. You’re just assuming shit.”

“He likes you. (Y/N), you’re not the same when you’re not with him.” his words were soft, the sincerity clearly shown.

“The hell is that supposed to mean?” your arms raised in confusion. Plopping down on your bed, you sighed loudly.

“He completes you. I didn’t think it was possible, actually. I used to laugh at people when they said stuff like that.” he chuckled. “You & Sam deserve to be happy. You belong with each other.” when there was a long pause from you, Bucky got up & approached the door. Stopping briefly after touching the doorknob to turn around & face you. “Please think about it, (Y/N).” shooting you one last warm smile, he exited. Leaving you alone with the silence being your only company.

Bucky was one of your best friends. You knew he would not lie to you. Not about something like that. And even though he loved messing with you, he was serious when he talked to you just now. Yes, you liked Sam. Of course you did. How could you not? His broad shoulders, muscles that you only ever got to see when he decided to change in front of you (which did not happen often enough for your liking). But why were you even thinking about that? If you were honest, you were not even sure if you would go on a date with him if he decided to ask. Was it to protect him & the others? Or was it to protect yourself from possible heartbreak? Or was it just to show yourself & the others that you were not someone who gave in easily? Not when everyone around you pushed you to do something. Wanted you to do something.

There was another knock on your door. This time, your head was thrown back in frustration. Bucky was a pain in the ass sometimes. He did not even give you enough time to go talk to Sam if you planned on doing so. Which you were not. Walking over to the door, you prepared a speech for Barnes.

“You know you’re actually an awful frien-“ you stopped dead in your tracks when the door opening revealed that it was not Bucky who came to invade your privacy again. It was Sam. Realizing what you just said, you started stuttering out an apology. “Oh God, Sam. I’m so sorry. I thought Bucky was-“

“No worries.” his laugh warmed your heart as much as you disliked to admit it. “Can I…?” he gestured to your room. Quickly stepping aside, you motioned for him to enter, apologizing once more. Why were you even saying sorry? There was literally no need to.

“You-You look gorgeous.” he eyed you up & down, taking in your appearance. Training your eyes down to the floor, you regained your composure a second later. You were not the embarrassed type.

“You don’t look too bad yourself, Wilson.” winking at him & his black turtleneck. Sam wearing this? Well, it did things to you. He patted the spot next to him on your bed. Getting the message, you walked over & seated yourself right beside him, body facing his. The most gorgeous brown eyes locked with your (Y/E/C) ones. It was hard to look away. Like you were trapped in them. But truth was, you did not want to look away. Sam was the first one to speak up. Voice only a whisper.

“What are we doing?” he asked & you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.

“W-What?” you really had no clue what he was talking about.

“This.” he gestured between you two. “What are we doing?”

“Well, Zemo said we’ll have to pretend to be married, right? So I guess we should just stay close to each other at all times & then see-“ you got interrupted by him shaking his head frantically, a smile still on his lips.

“I’m not talking about the mission, (Y/N).” his eyes met yours once more, an expectant expression on his face.

“O-Okay?” your head tilted to the side.

“Why are you making this even harder?” he sighed frustratingly but you could hear the sarcasm in his tone.

“I’m sorry?” it was more of a question, really. Quickly, he shook his head, one of his hand moving on top of yours.

“No, please don’t apologize. You do that way too often.” he chuckled. “Am I the only one thinking that there’s something between us?” your face changed in realization. No. Whatever he was doing, you hoped he would not go that way. If he did, it could ruin your entire friendship. And you were not sure if you could live without him. You did not want to live without him.

“I’m- I mean…I think we shouldn’t-“ you started only to be interrupted by him again.

“Why shouldn’t we?” he asked, voice raising just the slightest bit. You gave him a shrug in return, eyes focusing on his hand on top of yours in your lap. “Oh, I think I get it.” Sam started again when he realized that you were not planning on giving him an actual answer. “You’re scared.” this statement made you glance at him. He smirked at your expression because he knew that he had you now. “You’re scared that this won’t work out. And you don’t wanna give in.”

“Don’t wanna give in?” you played dumb but actually, it shocked you how well Sam knew you. Yeah, you had been close friends for a while now but still, nobody else could read you like he did.

“People have been bugging you to go out with me, haven’t they?” his eyebrows raised while waiting for you to confirm this. After a few moments, you nodded slightly. “That’s one of the reasons we aren’t dating yet.” he was straight forward with all of this. Like he had been preparing this speech for ages. Maybe he had, who knew?

“Yeah? You seem pretty damn sure about this.” you smirked at his certainty. Deep down, you knew he was right. But a little teasing never killed nobody, right?

“I know I’m right.” he pointed out, mimicking your smirk.

“Is that so? And why do you think that?”

“Because you’re too stubborn for your own good sometimes. “ you should feel hurt by him calling you out on this but you felt the exact opposite. It just showed you how much he actually paid attention to you. “You’re too stubborn & you like to do things your way. So when people tell you to do something…you tend to do the exact opposite.” his bright smile plastered one on your face as well.

“Guilty.” suddenly, it was way too silent. Not the usual silence but one that was uncomfortably quiet, even more so than normal. His hand cupping your cheek brought you back to reality. Leaning into his touch involuntarily, you closed your eyes briefly. Sam took the chance & closed the gap between you two. You were frozen in place at first but found yourself melting into the kiss soon. It was better than you ever imagined. And you were glad that he was the one who took that first step. Because you were, you had to agree with Sam here, way too stubborn to deal with this yourself.

After breaking away from each other, he rested his forehead against yours. Neither of you said anything for a few minutes. You simply enjoyed being with each other. Bucky’s words made their way into your mind again & you could not help but start laughing.

“What?” Sam pulled back, looking at you with that charming smile of his. Oh, how he loved when you laughed.

“Just…” you shook your head. “Bucky told me earlier today that I’m only myself when I’m with you. And I think I finally know what he meant.”

“Yeah? What did he mean?” he inquired.

“You know me better than I know myself.” this made him smile even wider. Leaning in one more time, he pressed another loving kiss to your lips. Wherever this was going, you could not wait for your journey with Sam.

Published (04/29/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @bibliophilewednesday, @msmarvelsmain, @babygirlwilly, @patricexirene (thanks for your support <3)

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freepandahugs · 4 years ago

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okay, so i kinda had this idea for a

MIRACULOUS ACTORS AU

(which i'm sure already exists somewhere because i'm unoriginal like that, but hear me out)

'Miraculous' is a wildly acclaimed tv drama. It's actually kinda dark too, but still amazing (it actually has character development too)

Mari is Bridgette and Adrien is Felix, and the rest play their same roles as in the series (except Gabriel, he's actually the director/producer of the series)

And i also offer you this:

Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

• oblivious af

• has a crush on adrien but thinks he doesn't like her back so she friendzones him constantly

• bffs with chloe, alya and luka

• is totally trying to set up luka with chloe

• also designs clothes, has a very suffessful clothing line

• plays bridgette in the "miraculous" tv drama

• used to date luka a long time ago but they are best buds now

Adrien Agreste:

• head-over-heels for marinette but is constantly friendzoned

• cat puns because he can

• son of the tv director, gabriel agreste

• bffs with kagami, nino and luka

• is totally trying to set up luka and kagami

• plays felix in the "miraculous" tv drama

Alya Cesaire:

• plays bridgette's best frien on the "miraculous" tv drama

• was a fangirl of marinette's character and accidentally went to a casting and got chosen for her role on the series

• totally ships adrinette, but is done with mari's bs

• started dating nino after their characters also started dating because they started spending a lot of time together

• bffs with chloe and mari, but also befriends lila (she's still kinda startruck with all her new famous friends, can't stop looking at lila through rose-colored glasses because of that)

Nino Lahiffe:

• plays felix's best friend on the "miraculous" tv drama

• young disney star who rose to stardom for his music and his amazing acting

• fell in love with alya when he saw her tumble into the set during auditions

• secretly asked the writers to give his and alya's characters more scenes together (he was bamboozled by the dating thing tho)

• bffs with adrien and luka, also best buds with the rest of the 'akuma class'

• the friendliest off all cast members, a social butterfly

Chloe Bourgeois:

• plays bridgette's rival/eventual friend on the "miraculous" tv drama

• is actually a sweetheart in real life, with fans, actors

• constantly donated to charity, but tells no one because she doesn't like to brag

• extremely shy too (she can't talk to kagami without becoming a tomato)

• is totally crushing on kagami, thinks it's unrequited

• absolutely has bi panic when she sees kagami and luka in the same room

• kinda hooking up with luka, but no strings attached (that's why mari is trying to set them up)

• bffs with alya, mari, adrien and luka

Kagami Tsuguri:

• plays bridgette's love rival/friend on the "miraculous " tv drama

• panics in gay when she sees chloe

• isn't out yet because of her family

• one time she was ogling chloe while she was talking with luka, and adrien came up to her and scared her, causing her to lie that she was looking at luka, thus making adrien want to set them up

• is convinced chloe hates her because he often chloe runs away when she tries to approach her

• bffs with mari and adrien, really good friends with luka too, but not quite as close as with the other two

Luka Couffaine:

• plays felix's love rival on the "miraculous" tv drama (they butt heads a lot for bridgette's affections)

• is actually a world-renowned rock artist, but he wanted to change it up a little and took up acting too

• accidentally finds himself in a love triangle that actually just two very chaotic girls that need to learn to communicate

• is actually aromantic (not asexual, he likes to mess around with people)

• used to date mari before he realized he didn't feel any romantic feelings for her (or anyone)

• they broke up in the best of terms tho, truly, they saw each other more as friends than as lovers

• a huge gabriel agreste's movies/series fanboy (even if he won't ever tell that to anyone, over his dead body)

Lila Rossi:

• plays bridgette's classmate/yet to be revealed main villain on the "miraculous" tv drama

• liar liar pants on fire

• likes to spread rumours around about all the cast members and what will happen in the series

• producers hate her

• but she's a damn good actor and the public seems to love her so they really can't kick her out (they really wish they could tho)

• everyone on cast kinda hates her too

• is trying to get with adrien, makes fun of mari to make her 'less appealing' to adrien (doesn't really work, boi is whipped)

• likes to wreck havoc in the relationships for the lols

Gabriel Agreste:

• director and producer of the "miraculous" tv drama

• ACTUALLY A GOOD FUCKING FATHER

• loves adrien very much, kind of overprotective of him after his wife's death

• but let's him have his freedom

• secretly has a bettinf pool with tom and sabine on when adrien and marinette will get together

• bffs with tom and sabine (mari's irl parents, they are still bakers), used to know each other in school and went on multiple double dates when emilie was still alive

• for some reason they never really organized a play date for mari and adrien when they were childre but oh well

#mlb #miraculous ladybug #actors au #they're all dumbasses here #they share one collective braincell too #might do some art for this #who knows #adrinette #lukanette #kagami x chloe #kagami x luka #chloe x luka #nino x alya #djwifi

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sunarintoes · 3 years ago

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synopsis: Yn Ln is an environmentalist - Miyagi University’s very own campus ‘Green Thumb.’ One day Hinata Shōyō - who happens to be a close friend of Yn, invites them to come to one of his races. The only problem is that this race of his is… illegal. Follow the journey of Yn who has been sucked into the world of illegal street racing with one goal: to create an eco friendly race car!

wc: 1.3k

cw: reader has a panic attack and faints

Masterlist

1.6 Can We Be Friends?

‘Hey stranger. Been a while.’

How long has it been since you heard that voice? A month? Maybe two? Whatever it is, it has been a long time. You can not erase the memories of someone so important in such a short time, sure you can pretend to but your subconscious knows better. Maybe it was a mistake to push him out of your mind because now that he is in front of you everything comes back in an overwhelming wave of emotions. The good and the bad. You do not know what to feel - there is too much. Euphoria, a rush of happiness because he is finally back yet angst, he left you hurt and lonely. Wait. You stop your rampant thoughts, I’m with Kiyoko, you tell yourself, Oikawa was nothing more than a frien- a common stranger.

‘Heard you’re with Karasuno’s pretty manager…’

‘Mm.’

‘Thats uh, that's good for you,’ he pauses to take in a sharp breath, ‘About that day… a month, 3 weeks and four days ago-’

‘You counted?’

He looks away from you, ‘yeah…’ his voice is shaky and quiet, and you wonder why he is so nervous. Is it you? No, no it cannot be- you shake these thoughts from your head and concentrate on the man in front of you.

‘I've uh, I've missed being strangers with you.’

‘Yeah me too,’ he breathes out slowly, ‘If I'm completely honest- I'm uh... well. It's not that I'm not honest or that I find it hard to be honest or that I'm a liar. I'm not a liar, I promise. It's just that I uh, I just find it hard to find the right things to say and when I do it's just, it’s too late to say them or I'm too scared to say them or I can't will myself to say them. I’m a coward. Yeah a huge one- look I'm sorry! I'm really sorry for the way I acted, I took your care for granted and I uh should've heard you out. You're a good friend- no! Stranger! Yes. Stranger. You're a good stranger. I um…’

You look at him with a smile, ‘You’re rambling.’

‘Yeah, yeah I am. Sorry. I guess it's just what happens I- right. Basically, I want you bac- as a friend! No! As a stranger! Please come back to me? I miss your warmth and the comfort and solace that comes with a kind stranger-’

‘Me too.’ He looks at you with shock scribbled all over his face, ‘I've missed you too, Tooru. Maybe, just maybe…’

‘We can be friends?’

You giggle, and he follows suit. ‘Who knew we’d be in sync?’

‘Yeah that's weird, we only just reconnected y’know?’

‘I know right? Maybe it was meant to be?’ You say it jokingly but it idles in the back of your throat, you said it jokingly… right?

He hums lightly, ‘I've done some soul searching this past month.’

‘Oh yeah? Have ya found anything?’

‘I think… But I'm not sure yet. I'm not sure when I'll know but I hope I can find a conclusion soon… Maybe, maybe you can help me? And give me some advice like you used to?’

‘As a friend it'll be my honour.’

Oikawa feels heat prick at his cheeks, ‘Not now’ he whispers to himself.

‘What was that?’

‘Maybe later? We can head over to the gas station and get a good ol’ vanilla bean frappe?’

‘Sounds perfect.’

‘Racers head over to the cockpit! The drag race begins in t minus fifteen minutes!’

‘Saeko’s as loud as ever huh?’

‘Well she is in charge of the announcements,’ you laugh, god he’d missed that laugh.

‘Guess I better head over huh?’

‘Yeah I guess you better, I'll be cheering for you - quietly of course. Can't let my team know,’ you wink at him, ‘Oh and Tooru?’

‘Hmm?’

‘Nice makeup. The glam look suits you.’

He flashes you a gorgeous smile and honestly? That’s just as good as any other reply he could have said. You turn around and head back to Karasuno’s garage, ‘Shit’ you curse to yourself, ‘Why is my heart beating so fast?’

✄.

‘Yn! Where’ve you been? I've been worried sick!’

And like a harsh wave on a windy day, you feel a rush of guilt splash over your whole body. You had forgotten, even if for a little while, that you had someone - that you had Kiyoko. Oikawa’s just a friend you tell yourself, you only feel this way because he is finally back. Nothing more, nothing else.

You look up into her beautiful, deep blue eyes and this time, for the first time in a long time, you notice how much she cares for you. It is so obvious, the way she looks at you like you are the only one in the room and it's so, so unfair. It's unfair that you cannot look at her that way. She deserves someone who loves her just as much as she loves you and you hate yourself, you really do, because you know you’ll never love her like that.

And then it strikes you. You only want her for her body. And the wave of guilt? It becomes a tsunami and suffocates you from the inside out. You feel your heartbeat speed up - when did it become as fast as the race cars? Then suddenly the tight, unforgiving noose around your throat ties itself stiff, you can't breathe. The last thing you hear before your world fades black is the desperate cries of Kiyoko, what’s she calling, you ask yourself, god… she's calling after me. I wish I could call out to her.

✄.

You wake up to a familiar scene, you are at Kiyoko’s.

‘You're finally awake.’

You turn your head towards her soft voice, ‘Mm Kiyoko? What happened?’

‘You went missing for about 15 minutes before the race started- or well before we had to get ready. When you came back you fainted and Asahi helped bring you here.’

‘I’m sor-’

‘Don't apologise. Just tell me what's on your mind.’

‘It’s, Im- I…’

‘Please,’ she begs.

‘Kiyoko I- I'm sorry. I don't know if it's just… I'm just overwhelmed at the moment. I'm sorry.’

‘Mm,’ she mumbles, moving closer to you. You feel her warm arms encircle you and pull you towards her, your back to her chest. Your heart does not speed up, it calms down. Maybe that's the effect of familiarity? ‘Lets just have a nap, yeah?’

‘Yeah,’ you whisper.

Her warmth brings you comfort, a comfort you wish you could give back. Maybe you are? Maybe you're not… you don't know. Her light snores used to be music to your ears but now they're nothing more than a mesh of messy drum beats, booming and thumping around your head. A small tear slips down the side of your face, ‘I wish I loved you.’

✄.

Kiyoko wishes you loved her too, she wished you loved her for more than just her body and the memories but you don't. Not that it matters, she thinks, as long as you are with her - as long as she can touch you, she doesn't care how you feel about her. She’ll take what she can get and she is oh so desperate for you, your touch, your taste, your sounds and oh god she must be a masochist.

When did she become so sadistic that she got off on her own pain? On your pain! She loves that you're broken and hurt and confused because that means she gets to be with you and oh she wishes that you’ll stay that way forever.

That is horrible isn't it? Yeah, she knows she’s fucked up but she’s fucked up for you and she wouldn't have it any other way.

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not-majestic-bluenicorn · 3 years ago

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Cravity’s League of the Universe Theory UPDATE

Season 3 Hideout: Be Our Voice & The Awakening: Written in the Stars

Hello! My name’s Ori and I write k-pop theories and fanfics and today I’m revisiting my Cravity theory cause apparently I didn’t update for Hideout Season 3 even though I thought I had lol This is going to be a mini update since there isn’t much to add, but let’s get right into it.

Arc 1: Hideout Season 3 Main Plot Points

During the prologue of Season 3 we finally get to see more about Woobin, Seongmin and Minhee. At the beginning they hear their names being called by Wonjin, who’s probably using his power to convince them to meet the others. Then we get to see a little of their private lives.

First Woobin is studying in his room when he spots a dead butterfly and revives it. He then tries to take the elevator to leave his apartment building but he ends up getting too scared and gives up; the instagram account also confirms his fear of elevators. He then presumably leaves to spend some time at the arcade. From Minhee, we get to see how carefully he cleans and takes care of his room, making sure even the smallest object is in place, before his alarms sound and he has to get ready to leave.

[Gif: Woobin picks up a dead butterfly, the scene cuts and we see the butterfly flying again.]

Seongmin is at the bus stop at night, waiting for it. We know from the Instagram posts he doesn’t want to go home so ends up choosing to go to the arcade and he forgets his cellphone. Minhee finds the cellphone and upon touching it discovers Seongmin’s plans and goes to meet him there. At the arcade, Seongmin struggles to play with the dart, but when he closes and opens his eyes again, suddenly he’s nailing every single shot.

[Gif 1: Minhee picks up Seongmin’s cellphone at the bus stop and has a vision of Seonming playing with darts and failing all his shorts.

Gif 2: Seongmin is at the arcade playing darts, he closes his eyes and after he opens them he does a perfect shot.]

Minhee arrives during this and gives Seongmin his cellphone, which is when they notice they both have similar stones. Woobin also notices this and joins them. They notice Seongmin’s injured hands and Woobin heals him, revealing his power to them.

[Screenshot: Woobin standing with his back to the camera. His arm is up as he shows Seongmin and Minhee his stone.

Gif: Woobin grabs Seongmin’s injured hands in his and his hands start to shine as he heals Seongmin. The scene fades to white with the light coming from his hands.]

After a cutscene, we see the other six at their hideout. Wonjin is explaining that Seongmin and Minhee are a year younger than them and that Woobin is his and Hyeongjun’s classmate. He also mentions already calling them and Allen adds that he’s dreamt of them as well. Finally, the three of them arrive and introduce themselves.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of a table with pictures of Minhee, Seongmin and Woobin sprawled on it. The caption reads “The friends from Allen’s dream that he talked about. Friens that Allen introduced to me. I’m sure they could hear my voice will they? Finally today! #photo taken by Hyeonjun

Screenshot from Epilogue: The nine members sitting around a table in their hideout.]

In the epilogue, they’re all spending time together at the hideout. Wonjin and Taeyoung are talking. Seongmin is repairing something for Hyeongjun. Serim, Jungmo and Minhee are with Revue when Jungmo tests Serim’s power by asking him what is the color of the third cloth in his wardrobe. Serim correctly guesses it’s a purple hoodie. We also confirm Jungmo’s ability to communicate with animals. Finally, Woobin is asking Allen if he can predict which team will win tomorrow’s game, to which Allen responds that’s not how his power works, before they’re interrupted by Seongmin asked to be healed by Woobin.

The scene cuts to them playing a board game. Taeyoung tries to cheat by freezing time but Hyeongjun discovers and stops him. Suddenly, Allen looks up and all the lights around them begin to turn off before they look at the camera and the final light goes out. Then, Allen wakes up to Woobin calling him. Finally, in the Hidden Film we see all but Seongmin and Minhee celebrating their graduation.

[Gif: The members look around as the lamps they were using for light start to turn off on their own.]

What is happening?

Before we update the character profiles let’s talk a little bit about what’s going on. First of all, they’ve finished reuniting and Hideout is over just as we had predicted. This means the stasis stage of the story is over and now we need a trigger. While I think that The Awakening: Written in the Stars is sort of a little break while they work on the next part of the story, because we didn’t get any films or updates on the Instagram account, I also think that the title has more meaning to it than that.

First of all, the simple phrase “the awakening” already feels like a trigger because the word itself alludes to the start of something. I also think it might be literally referencing Allen waking up from the vision he has in the Season 3 Epilogue. Yes, I’m pretty sure the whole last scene is a vision, and while it’s a little different, it does preserve that 4th-wall-breaking aspect we’ve seen in some of his visions before, so it’s not a stretch.

What does this mean for them? Well, simply put, danger is coming, and whether they like it or not, they might have to start learning real soon how to better use their abilities. To be honest, I’m still not sure Starship is gonna go full superhero on them, because most of their powers are very passive, but we’ll see!

Updating the profiles

Now that we know a bit more about our last three characters, let’s summarize what we know and then make a list with their powers.

Minhee

He is an extreme perfectionist, to the point that every single thing must have its place and it seems that he has a very detailed routine to keep order in his room. We can also see that he has quite a lot of alarms that establish the order of his day. He doesn’t seem to have an adverse reaction to disorder though, and simply seems to enjoy the act of keeping his space clean and perfect, because we don’t see him do that with the hideout.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of a perfectly organized shelf with the caption “Neat and tidy. Finished cleaning up my room.”]

Seongmin

Seongmin hates being home, to the point we don’t even get to see his house in any of the videos. He doesn’t mention it in the videos but he’s pretty verbal about it in the Instagram posts. It is quite likely he has a bad relationship with his parents and he seems to wander around a lot. He is also extremely prone to getting injured apparently. Someone help the lost puppy.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of Seongmin sitting on a bench at a bus stop with the caption “Not yet... don’t wanna go home like this, should I go there again?”]

Woobin

Woobin lives in an apartment complex and he seems to be a good student. The one thing that definitely stands out about him is his fear of using the elevator. It’s still unknown if it comes from any particular elevator-related trauma or if maybe he has major claustrophobia caused by something that isn’t specifically related to elevators. However, he’s pretty terrified of them and although he’s been trying to overcome it, it hasn’t worked for him at all.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of Woobin’s hand as he presses the button to call the elevator with the caption “Please, just for today...”]

The powers

Finally, the list:

Serim - People-focused psychometry, he obtains information about others, seemingly by accessing their knowledge and memories. So far his ability has only been seen with the members.

Allen - Precognition through dreams, he has dreams in which he’s able to see the future. All dreams seem to be tied to the members so far.

Jungmo - Animal Telepathy, he’s able to understand and communicate with animals.

Woobin - Accelerated Healing, so far we’ve seen him heal small injuries and bring back to life small creatures.

Wonjin - Telepathy, he can communicate with others through the mind, even if they’re far away. So far his ability has only been seen with the members.

Minhee - Future-focused psychometry, this one is still in doubt since we’ve only seen him use it once, but he seems to be able to see the future of the person who last touched the object.

Hyeongjun - Legit, no idea, what is your deal, child?

Taeyoung - Time stopping, he’s able to completely stop time for everyone else except Hyeongjun. He can continue moving and doing things normally when he does it.

Seongmin - Enhanced accuracy and precision, again this one is still in doubt since we’ve only seen him use it once, but he seems to be able to perfectly nail every shot he makes.

Conclusions

Cravity might actually be in danger, depending on what Allen’s vision meant. One thing is for sure though, the story is starting to move forward. On the other hand, someone help me with Hyeongjun, I accept suggestions.

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myhauntedsalem · 3 years ago

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CAN CHILDREN SEE GHOSTS? 17 SPINE-CHILLING TRUE STORIES THAT PROVE THEY DO

Have you ever found your child talking to “someone” when they were alone in their room? Is it simply an active imagination or could it be a visitor from beyond the grave?

For most parents, when their child tells them about their new imaginary friend, they simply put it down to their child’s active imagination. Completely normal… right? Well, I wouldn’t be so sure. It’s a widely held belief that some children can see and connect with those who have passed on. A popular theory is that we’re all born with the ability to connect to the other side but, as we grow up and become more cynical and disbelieving of all things unknown, that ability disappears. The following chilling true tales of imaginary friends and unseen visitors in the dead of night might go some way in proving that our children can and do communicate with the dead.

Parents beware, you’ll be checking under the bed and in your closets after reading these horrifying supernatural encounters.

1. THE BELIEVER

I believe that there are happenings on this earth that cannot be logically explained. I’ve always been a little skeptical, but I didn’t completely denounce that ghosts exists.

However, I’m starting to think they are definitely real, and that little kids can see them.

Yesterday, Sunday, I volunteered to watch the little kids of my church while their parents were out volunteering. Our church meets in the community center, so that’s where I was watching the kids — one baby, and two 2-year-olds – a boy and a girl. And you are right, our church is not very big.

After the center cleared out, it was just me and one other volunteer. She had the baby in a side room, trying to put him down for a nap. I had the two-year-olds in the main room.

I had a “weird feeling” all day, and kept feeling like there was someone standing behind me, but chalked it up to being alone in the building. The kids and I were sitting on the floor and rolling a ball back and forth to one another when the boy asked if we could throw it instead. I said yes and we stood up. He ran towards me and threw the ball just out of my reach. It went behind me. I did not hear it bounce.

The kids looked at each other and started giggling. I whirled around and saw the ball suspended in midair for a split second before falling to the ground. The kids just kept laughing. They started pointing and saying what sounded like “the man! the man!”

That was all the “paranormal” that occurred yesterday. The kids didn’t say anything about “the man” for the rest of the day. It freaked me out, but I wasn’t scared. I just wanted to share.

2. IT WAS JUST A DREAM

My daughter used to tell me about a man who came into her room every night and put the sign of the cross on her forehead. I thought it was just a dream. Then my mother-in-law sent over some family photos. My daughter looked right at the picture of my husband’s father (who has been dead for 16 years) and said ‘That’s the man who comes into my room at night!’ My husband later told me his father would always do the sign of the cross on his forehead when he was young.

3. DADDY, WHO’S THAT MAN?

When my daughter was younger (maybe 2 1/2 years old) she slept in her crib in the room next to me and my wife. One night she was stirring and maybe a little frightened, so I went in to get her and brought her to our room. She was wide awake now in our bed and not scared at all now. She was looking wondrously at the foot of our bed saying “look at the lights, the sparkles….” Kind of playfully she kept mentioning “the lights”. Then she said “Daddy, who’s that man?” Pointing directly at the foot of our bed.

It was definitely unsettling.

We had bought the apartment from a very elderly couple who passed in the apartment a few months earlier. Probably never forget that.

4. THE CAPTAIN

A parent of one of my students told us in a meeting that she was concerned because her son (7 years old) talked about an invisible ghost who would talk to him and play with him in his room. He said the ghost was called The Captain and was an old white guy with a beard. The kid would tell his mom that The Captain told him when he grows up his job will be to kill people, and The Captain would tell him who needed to be killed. The kid would cry and say he doesn’t want to kill when he grows up, but The Captain tells him he doesn’t have a choice and he’ll get used to killing after a while.

I was always creeped out working with that student after that.

5. MY COUSIN TRACY

When my niece was about 4 she had an imaginary friend, which I don’t remember the name of. She would blame things she did on this imaginary friend but also talked about how this friend would watch Scooby Doo with her. One day I thought, why don’t I find out more about this friend. So I asked her to tell me about her friend. And she said, “She’s a she and she’s dead.” And I said okay, “Does she have a job?” and she said, “She does what my Daddy does!” Which is that her imaginary friend was a cop. Okay. So then I said, “Where is your imaginary friend a policewoman at?” and she said, “Right next to where my daddy is a policeman.” And I said okay. But then she said, “I met her when I was in my mummy’s belly. She touched me when I was inside.”

A few months before my niece was born my cousin Tracy had died. She was hit by a train. She loved watching Scooby Doo and had a ton of memorabilia. She was also a cop. She was a cop in the town that is right next to the one my brother-in-law is a cop in, my nieces “Daddy.” My niece’s imaginary friend was my dead cousin. There is no other way she could have known all that at the age of 4.

6. EMILY

when my sister was probably about 6 or 7, she had an imaginary friend named Emily. She told us Emily lived in her closet, wore an old black dress, and had long dark hair and she was the same age as my sister. My sister played with Emily constantly. My parents started noticing my sister acting weird. Just sitting in the middle of her room whispering to Emily quite a bit and acting a lot more distant towards them. I remember a very specific day, my brother was walking by her room and my sister was sitting in the middle of her room….but she turned around and hissed at him. He was scared shitless. He told me it didn’t even look like my sister. My parents ran up to her room and i could hear my sister just screaming and screaming as loud as she “Get out”.

I have no idea what happened in that room but I ran to the bottom of my stairs and the screaming stopped, I saw my parents holding my sister crying their eyes out, she was sobbing as well. I’ve asked her about it today. She’s 24 now. She told me that Emily used to tell her to do horrible things to herself. She actually used to wake up on the roof and not remember how she got there. I’m not kidding. Apparently, Emily absolutely hated my parents so she turned my sister against them. She hates talking about it so I never brought up that specific night. This all happened at my old house. When we moved into a different house, Emily was gone. I’m not making any of this up. My sister’s little friend was a really big deal to my family and messed things up for a long time. I’m just relieved we left that house.

I’m not making any of this up. My sister’s little friend was a really big deal to my family and messed things up for a long time. I’m just relieved we left that house.

7. JESSICA

A little after I was born, my sister Julia had an imaginary friend named Jessica. She was Julia’s friend for a long time, when things started to get a little weird. At first my parents shrugged it off as a normal occurrence, but after a while they began to believe that our house was haunted .One night as my parents put me (about one years old) to sleep, I begin to cry and point at the corner, my mom was still in there and began to try to comfort me, but I continued to cry and point at the same corner. All of the sudden, my sister walks into my room and points at the corner and yells “Jessica stop it!”

Immediately I stop crying and Julia says like it is completely normal that “Sometimes Jessica likes to put on scary masks and scare people”. My mom who was understandably freaked out stammers to my sister “Tell Jessica that if she can’t play nice, she can’t play here at all”.

A couple weeks go by and Julia tells my Mom that “Her eyes turn green when she is mad and her voice gets deeper”. My Mom didn’t know how to respond to this and just said “ok….”

Eventually Julia outgrows her “imaginary” friend and stops playing with her.

A year and a half later my little sister Abbey begins to talk, she then goes on to tell us about her friend that no one else can see. She then tells my mom about how her eyes turn green when she is upset. I remember this distinctly because she dropped a pan and it scared me. She asked Abbey what her name was and she said…

“Jessica.”

8. THE BOY IN THE TREE

My folks’ farm surrounds a cemetery, and my dad and my niece were walking down there. My niece (4) looks up and says “What’s that boy doing up in that tree?” There was no boy, but she insisted there was and could describe him.

9. YOU’RE DOING A GOOD JOB

My wife and I overheard my two-year-old daughter on the baby monitor wake up on Saturday morning and say “what? OK, I’ll tell her” then get up and come into our bedroom and told my wife “Mary says you’re doing a good job.”

Mary was her grandmother that she was extremely close too that passed away.

10. THE MAN IN THE DOORWAY

When my nephew was born, ten years ago now. Around age 2/3 He’d wake up in the middle of the night and when my sister and her fiance went to settle him down he’d be staring at the corner of the room, or at the open doorway saying there was a man standing there, that he came and talked to him at night. Sometimes he was scared, sometimes he was calm, but my sister was terrified!

11. MY FRIEND JOE

Not my kid, but something my mum said I did when I was little.

I had this imaginary friend named “Joe” – was pretty normal imaginary friend stuff to begin with, my parents would ask about him and I’d respond with something like “I like Joe” “He has curly black hair” “He likes to play outside” nothing interesting.

Until one day I come out with “Joe has to work a lot, but Joe’s boss doesn’t like him.” when asked why, I responded with “Oh, it’s because Joe’s black.” As if it was obvious. Now this wouldn’t have been weird at all if I hadn’t grown up in a very small all-white town. And I was about 3 years old, I didn’t know (or rather, hadn’t been taught) that racism was even a thing.

This continued on for a while, I’d mention Joe now and then, sometimes talking about what he did for fun, or his favorite things, other times mentioning that his boss hits him and shouts all the time.

After a few months, I go up to my mum one day and have a conversation that went something like this: “Joe’s really happy today. His boss isn’t coming back” ‘Why?’ “He’s dead” ‘Oh yeah? How did he die?’ “He hung himself from up there” (as I point up towards the attic door).

I don’t remember much of this, I definitely remember having an imaginary friend named Joe.

12. THE LITTLE GIRL

My grandfather had a camp on Lake Dering in NH when I was a kid. One day when I was 6 or so, I fell off of the dock and into the water. I couldn’t swim. While under, I distinctly remember seeing a little girl down there who told me to look up towards the sun and just keep kicking and I’d be fine. I swam to the surface just in time for my grandfather to swoop me up and pull me back on the dock.

And, yes, I found out later that a little girl drowned in the lake near that same spot (of course).

13. THE IMAGINARY FRIEND

When my daughter was three she had an imaginary friend named Kelly who lived in her closet. Kelly sat in a little rocking chair while she slept, played with her, etc. Typical imaginary friend shit. Anyway, fast forward two years later, the wife and I are watching the new Amityville (the one with Ryan Renolds) and our daughter walks out right when dead girl goes all black eyed. Far from being disturbed, she said “That looks like Kelly.” “Kelly who?” we say “You know the dead girl that lived in my closet.”

14. HER EYES WOULD FOLLOW IT

I had tons of experiences like this when my little girl was born a few years ago. From being just a few months old we noticed she’d randomly start looking over at something and giggling, like something was making her laugh. Her eyes would follow it around the room. And sometimes we’d feel like it was stood right next to us or behind us and then we’d noticed she was looking at it, or smiling in that direction. It never caused any problems though, in fact, when she was upset she’d look over at it and start laughing or smiling. And if we couldn’t find something we really needed, suddenly it’d appear right in front of us, when we knew we’d checked there a hundred times.

Stopped around the time she turned two.

15. PUNISHMENT

I was seventeen and babysitting a friend of the family’s six-year-old. he’d been in bed a couple of hours and I just peeked in to check on him. he wasn’t in the bed and when i opened the door wider, I saw he was standing in the corner, facing the wall. creepiest fucking thing ever. I asked him what he was doing and all he did was turn around, smile, and put his finger to his lips as if to say “shhh”. I asked him again what he was doing and all he says is, “leave us. It is the punishment.”

16. HE DOESN’T HAVE A FACE

My son from the age of three always tells me about the “creeper man” who lives in my mom and dads bedroom. He brings it up after he visits them. I made the mistake once of asking what he looks like. My son said “Oh, he doesn’t have a face.”

17. I WAS THE SAME

I tend to be skeptical also, even when I love reading about paranormal stuff, the only thing that has kind of freaked me out has been my nephew a couple of years ago when he was about 2 1/2 years old would talk to a man only he could see at my house and an old lady at his grandparents house.

My mother tells me I was the same, talking and playing with my grandfather for a few months after he died, I would call to him and hold conversations with him and even wish him good night before going to bed.

#CAN CHILDREN SEE GHOSTS #shared stories #paranormal #ghost and hauntings #ghost and spirits #haunted salem #myhauntedsalem

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emeraldbabygirl · 4 years ago

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Ok. Now that it is safely in my drafts and backed up to my drive I will be posting it. However, I feel it is very important that I say this. Normally my fanfics are either cringey cute shit or bad smut. Not bad meaning bad but bad meaning it’s trash. I think I put a warning when I posted the Horyeong smut. I will be posting a fanfic with a mafia theme. It is with Mill from Onlyoneof so both onlyoneof and mill will be tagged. I’m scared because I don’t want people’s opinions of me to change. I don’t want people thinking I’m a bad person for writing this. I put a lot of warnings and tagged whatever tws I could think of that it has in it. I can’t say much else. This post is even a warning before I actually post the fanfic. I can’t prevent anyone from not paying attention and reading it anyway but don’t get mad at me if you read it anyway um and are mad that it’s not enough warnings or horrible like, unless if you can’t read the warnings are there for a reason. I don’t know what else to say or do, how many more tags to add. I’m afraid the followers and mutuals I just made will hate me? It’s just another experiment in my writing. It doesn’t happen a lot. This darker stuff. So if you still read it and hate it or me you have some fun options. Unfollow me, block me, ignore me. Please just don’t report me I might lose my entire blog and I really don’t want that. I’d like to keep my blog and all the fun and wild posts as progress on my writing and fond memories with internet friens. Please don’t ruin that for me :( I will cry. So..yeah. Just a warning before the other warnings.

#thank you for coming to my jaehyeong talk #onlyoneof #mill #onlyoneof fanfics #onlyoneof smut #mill fanfic #mill smut #let the party begin I guess

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mochi-marie · 4 years ago

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IKUZU HCS ?? i have food 🙏🏾

1) midorya is rlly insecure about his hands so when u kiss them, he gets very blushy n he loves when u say how much u appreciate them !!

2) very very caring bf ofc and his love language is giving gifts !! sometimes he can go a bit overboard but he's not too good with his words and he wants u to feel like the world

3) he likes the ocean. like he was the kid who was obsessed with going in the water as a kid and when u two go on vacations to the beach or park, hes in the water 80% of the time

4) he probably smells like warm cinnamon + apples for some reason 🤨

5) gives rlly nice hugs, he wraps his arms around yer entire body and jus snuggles u to death, even picks you up when he gets too excited, i'm not taking criticism 😶

OMFHSGEH OH MY GOSH??? THESE ARE ALL GREAT?? IM SCREAMIBF-

the first one is something i thought about all the time 🥺🥺 omgggg lemme kiss his fingertips and the scars lining the back of his hands aaAHHH-

😳 that’s so cute?? I hate asking people for things ( like it’s my b-day soon and no one knows what i want cause im like “you don’t have to get me anything i swear-“ ) but it’s really cute that his love language could be gift giving 🥺

...WHY DO I SEE IT? inko’s just on the beach, everything’s packed up and ready to go so they can go home, and there’s baby izuku.. still playing in the water with his fish friens 😭💛 he’s squealing every time the fish brush against his legs but he isn’t scared he’s just fascinated shsjx-

awh that’s so cute ☺️☺️ i can definitely see that!!

😳 uhh idk ‘bout that 😖 the one thing that makes me a lil sad when thinking about izuku all the time is that i’m a bigger / chubby girl and he seems smaller than me an’... 👉👈🥺 but OMG SNUGGLE HUGS??? YES PLEASE-

#🐚.interacts: astrorae #do you want an emoji for your tag? 🥺#you come here often so ‘m jus’ wonderin’ ☺️

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pernatius · 4 years ago

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Lost in Space Part 11: Ch 5

Summary: Finally, on Commander Knox’s spaceship, the trio finds themselves running out of time before the commander becomes an all too powerful Watcher.

Lost in Space on Tumblr

Lost in Space on ao3

The rest of the Lords, except for Four, got up from their thrones. Four, with luminous hands, clapped. A book seemed to plop down onto their lap out of nowhere, and they quickly scribbled something down. As for the rest of us, besides Seven, in unison, we repeated, "Daughter?"

"Ah, yes." One glances at the rest of the Lords with a cocked head before continuing, "Why are you all baffled? Higher beings have always done this to lower beings throughout time even before we were created for this universe. Human history even consists of gods breeding with them multiple times."

Third, one of their incredibly long, gangly arms that I now see has that circular symbol with the dot inside of it, which consists of their knuckles scratching against the floor as they move it upwards towards their face, moves their thumb and index finger apart. Their two bony fingernails, which swirl and curve, squeeze where their nose should be as they groan, "Yes, One, but at least all of those times were aliens breeding with other aliens. None of which consisted of a Lord or anything close to an actual god."

Two starts off sharply when they call, "One." Before Two can finish, they take a step towards One and rest their great hand on One's right shoulder. The mere gesture sounded like the same explosion I was supposed to die from. They then end their response with a soft, understanding voice, "What would Zero say to your inappropriate joke?"

One points at me and replies, "This isn't a joke." They place their hand on their chest, over the symbol. "That is my daughter."

"Blasphemy, Zero would say." Two yanks their hand off of One.

Off to the side, Four nestles before whispering with their head deep into the book and hand still jotting down what's happening. "This is getting good."

My crown floated on its side in front of One's chest, slowly spinning as it did. Through it, my eyes focus on the symbol. Everything around me turns a dark yellow, but after I blink, the tint fades. Another blink, and I feel my hands heating up. Moving them in front of me, I see a spark of my powers; apparently, a spike of my hidden bloodline, one moment until it vanishes with yet another blink.

Besides Four, who's smiling with the eyes on their raisin-like arms, and silent Seven, the Lords are squabbling. Two are shouting at One with a blazing golden aura around them. Lanky Three is begging for Two to calm down. Overweight Five and glamorous Six are also bombarding One. Still, the former is more interested if they're any more "abnormalities" rather than angered, while the latter is scared over how crowded this void will get in the coming days. One has ignored Two and is trying to relieve the two Lords to his left when I interject with, "How can you possibly be one of my parents? I've seen my mother and father and I'm sure I would've noticed either of them being some white cloaked, faceless giant."

All but One grows silent, but they all focus on me. Even Four stops writing and lowers their book to peek up at me. The Lords around One hesitantly turn towards them. "That's because your mother was a whore."

Hands returning to being submerged into a golden light, I encircle my crown with some of my powers. Before One can react, I snatch my hurtling crown and point my longsword at them. "Take back what you said about my mother."

Somehow this void became bigger. I suppose it's thanks to the Lords around One either stepping away from them or sinking into their thrones. One teleports just a foot in front of me. Air slams onto me like I was just hit with a violent hurricane the size of an entire country. It pushes me, much of my skin off my bones, away from the giant as my feet point upwards, fluttering against this rough wind. I nearly fly up and am lost to the void if it wasn't for me, forcing the tip of my blade into the seemingly nonexistent floor and holding onto its handle for dear life. My heart drops as I see my sword wiggling loose. It felt as if it climbed up my throat and slid out of my mouth when it eventually gave in. I scramble in the air, watch the Lords look up at me for a moment until I change my sword into a bow. I shoot. One steps back before the arrow, which is attached to a string I'm gripping so tightly that my veins are popping out, can strike their left foot.

Moving one hand closer, along the rope, to One and the lingering force of their teleportation meant being pushed back two paces. This pattern not only leaves my hands with lacerations but me gripping the rope's unwound end. I'm one heartbeat until I'm sent flying deeper into the void until I fall face first back onto the floor. When I change my bow back into a sword and use it to stand back up, I look up at One, who's staring down at me again. "You, feeble human, want me, a being you can never comprehend how powerful, to take back an observation about a woman who treated you like a dog until she died? She never loved you, you know that?" One bellows out a laugh. "That's right, you don't. You don't remember anything about her.

"You wish to protect the honor of someone who you don't know. Zero, who we seven were, would've laughed at that, which could be an accomplishment depending on how old they were. In the beginning, Zero felt nothing, but near the end they felt everything."

"I don't remember my past. So, yes, I don't remember her, but I knew her at one point and she is still my mother whether she loved me or not." Golden electricity sparks around the blade as I swing it towards One who simply steps away between my swift, blurring movement. Once my sword finishes making an arch, a force as strong as the beat of Cala's wings blows out from it.

One swings a foot towards me. I try cutting through it, but when it hits my blade, it cracks, then is sent shattering, and I am sent flying towards the other Lords along with the pieces of my sword. My back and the fragments of metal hit One's backrest, and I, along with them, fell down on the seat. It's the feeling of someone poking my shoulder that brings me to force up my aching body as joints slide back together and bones and tissue reknit.

I throw up and am greeted by a severed hand that's popped up from a floating disk of pure darkness directly right in front of me. There's nothing on the other side of it, but the punch that comes from the hand that's at its forefront tells me that it doesn't matter.

Back of my head grating against Two's throne, then body flopping back down, I wipe the drip of vomit from my lips. One clarifies as they rub their wrist when I finally manage to look at them, "That was for making a mess of my seat, but I can keep tossing you around if you wish."

Sitting on the throne gets a growl out of Two and One to turn to me. I hold my side, which is still in pain, and eye my broken sword a little off from who's supposed to be my other parent. "What I wish?" I see my body is glowing through my reflection from the blade's pieces in the corner of my eye. Resting my hands on the armchairs once the nanites finish healing me nearly gets Two to pounce. I saw them bursting with the golden glow, which was almost like they were being engulfed in a gold-colored fire until Three rests their hand on the annoyed Two. "Why does it matter what I wish? I am what I've grown to fear and what I hate. I killed Knox. There's still a war out there, but I can't do anything about it because I am stuck in wherever the hell this place is."

"Why do you hate us?"

I blurt out, "Because you've made an entire fucking mess of the universe. Knox was insane, but he is right. You've all been sitting on your ass while things out there turn into chaos. My life too, apparently."

The Lord that just ripped a hole through the void moments ago now rips a hole right beside them. They seemingly grabbed hold of nothing, and after the white flap touches the floor, the new view gets me to jump out of the throne and step towards it because, before me, I see hundreds of ships shooting at each other. One explodes, and its pieces are sent flying into other ships and through a handful of men and women about to land on a nearby enemy ship. Billions are fighting on enemy ships: millions are punching and kicking, shattering helmets or denting armor, thousands are blasting or clawing right through chests and heads, and some have even ripped through others by grabbing their wrists and pulling them apart until their bodies became two, which caused guts to float out in space, but a handful did worse. I'm sickened through all of this, but it's that last bit that breaks me. I grab my face and try to talk myself to remain composed, but my tears push through anyways.

One breaks through my disgust, "Yes, we have, but the universe isn't black and white. There are so many colors out there. With Knox gone, things are much more fucked up than before.

"Some feel the need to avenge Knox. Others see weakness. Most are inspired by the fallen commander. At least this is only two years in. Things will get progressively worse, though."

"Two years? I just killed Knox a few minutes ago. How has time passed that quickly?"

They put back the flap, and the horrific imagery of war is put away. "We are in the very blackhole that created the universe. Time is fast out there and slow in here, but I think your friends will arrive here in six minutes thanks to that serpent girl, give or take. Isn't that right, Watcher?"

I jump when a Watcher suddenly appears to my left. The thing looks at me. Two steps out of the way as the multi souled being drifts towards One and bows before them when they're a few feet in front of the Lord. "Yes," the Watcher confirmed.

"Excellent. You may go." The Watcher vanishes. "Now then would you like to continue to be thrown around like a ragdoll until your friends come and I kill them or sit back down to wait for me to kill your friends?"

"Why," I grunted through gritted teeth.

"Why what? Why were we created? We were created because people wanted us to be created. Did you know everyone spoke the same language before us? Even humans used the same language for a time long ago. That was when Zero was just a speck. Zero became us seven because people wanted to feel. Initially, emotions didn't exist. It's because of Two you want to rip off my head and now that you know this I still don't understand why you hate us. We are you and you are us."

Knuckles turning white, I burst with a golden glow and shout, "No, why did you make me?" I don't have my sword anymore, but that doesn't mean I'm harmless. I fly and charge towards the Lord, and when I'm about to punch them, they simply move aside.

"You are the first and only one of your kind. You are a partial Lord, but while you've only known about this for mere minutes I've gotten used to my powers for thousands of years." Again, they rip a hole into the void and grab the back of my head. One throws me down and drags me across the floor. For a place of nothing, I sure felt something grind against my face. My face is leaking blood, but One seizes my legs and then hurls me across the room. I'm sure nothing was there before, but something sharp goes right through me. I cough out blood, and as I'm grabbing whatever it is and slowly pull myself free, One quickly does it for me. I scream, and midway through my body stitching the hole up, the Lord punches through the hole forty-five times until One grows tired of that.

I fall with a hard thud and try to inch away, but the Lord sets a foot onto my back and proceeds to crush me. I feel the bones that make up my spine fracture piece by piece. I sob and beg for mercy. This gets Two, Three, and Five to inch towards us. They resist taking another step, probably because One motions for them to stay where they are. "You're a late bloomer, human, but we both know you can stop me. So, why are you letting me do this to you? Do you hate yourself so much that you'd let your third parent brutally hurt you? Answer me."

I sigh with relief when One steps off of me, but it's not over yet. The Lord kicks me, and I'm flung across the room towards the rest of the other Lords. I coil and wrap my arms around the shrinking hole in my stomach. Once that heals, I stumble up, swaying a little, and look up at the sudden arrival of One. One steps on my feet and proceeds to punch me left and right. I motion my hands in front of me, once again begging them to stop, but they only stop when their fists are hot from all the punching.

"My daughter, I'm barely using one percent of my powers." I flop down, and One has one of their hands, which is now glowing, raised towards me. They're charging up for a final attack. "Do you wish to die that much?"

"Yes."

Lowering their hand, the Lord asks, "Why?"

"I asked the same of you. Hey, what are you waiting for? Kill me already."

"No." One takes a seat in front of me, but there's still a considerable size difference between us. They sigh before continuing with, "I made you because I am not a real person. I'm made from envy by a number of people you can't even comprehend how many, so my thoughts are not my own. Through the part of me that lives in you I'm able to live as a real person. I'm able to have my own thoughts. I'm able to have my own feelings through having an actual life."

"Selfish bastard!" I blast at them, but One easily deflects it when they summon a shield.

"I answered your question and now you have to answer mine."

"I want you to kill me because the universe doesn't need me. It never has."

#233 #lost in space #my writing #writers on tumblr #writeblr

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donteattheappleshook · 5 years ago

Note

AU Prompt: Emma pushed Killian away when he confessed his feelings to her. He’s finally returned home, a bit broken by the world. Will she finally have the guts to tell him what she always regretted not saying? (Can be smutty or not)

Sorry this took a few weeks but here it is! Thank you for my first ever prompt! I don’t know if this is what you wanted but this is what it turned into... nearly 10000 words of friends to lovers angst.

You can read it on Ao3

Send me your prompts!

Emma met Killian Jones when she was seventeen years old and she hadn’t liked him one bit. From the moment he’d first said hello to her she’d read him as a cocky, smooth talking broody type who probably liked to win over girls with his accent and his Edward Cullen like aloofness. She had not been a fan. She’d let him know too, on multiple occasions.

She’d spent most of her time avoiding him for the first month of the semester and she was doing a pretty good job of it actually. That is, until she got detention. For being late. How unfair was that? It wasn’t her fault that Ruth’s car wouldn’t start in the morning and so she and David had had to walk to school. David got away with it, he always did. He was sweet and friendly and he could charm teachers like it was nobody’s business.

Emma had scowled and defended her innocence and had ended up with detention. She loved the guy, really. Ever since he and Ruth had taken her in a year ago she was nothing but grateful for their kindness and love. She’d even started referring to him as her brother. She just hated how much better he was at being a person than she was sometimes.

That was the second time she met Killian Jones. She was shocked to find him there. Despite her first impression she had managed to discover that he was, at his core, a nerd. He may dress like the love interest in a teen movie but he spent most of his time in the library or sitting under trees reading or doing homework. He even wore glasses sometimes, these big, awful square things that took over half his face. So what was he doing in detention?

“Afternoon, Swan,” he said when she walked in. He was immediately shushed by the teacher who had gotten the unfortunate role of supervising them. “I’m just being friendly,” she heard him mutter under his breath.

They were the only two in there today. They had to stay for an hour after school. She guessed the punishment for being late to class was being late to dinner. They were told to sit silently and to either do homework or read. Emma figured she might as well try to get through some of her English homework. She was crap at it and it was the one subject that David couldn’t help her with. She’d rather do it here then at home.

She started working through the questions for Act 1. Why the hell did they still study Shakespeare? The guy was dead four hundred years now. Give it up already - let him rest in peace. She was working on the third question - guessing the answer to the third question was more like it - when she heard a small cough beside her. She looked up to find Killian leaning over in his seat, his own homework in front of him.

“That’s the wrong answer,” he said quietly and she raised a brow at him.

“What?”

“Your answer, Mercutio isn’t Romeo’s cousin. Benvolio is. Mercutio is just his friend.” Her eyes widened in surprise. He wasn’t being condescending or self-righteous. He was just… letting her know. Trying to help her, she realised. He looked nervous as he glanced at her and then back at his book.

“How do you know that?” she asked.

“I’m in your English class,” he said, looking down, ears turning red. Right. And she was a jerk. She felt bad, he looked a little dejected and it was her fault. She hadn’t seen him hanging around with many people, he was usually alone. Like her. She wondered then, a bit sadly, if maybe he wasn’t alone because he wanted to be. Maybe he was alone because he didn’t have anyone - like her.

“Thanks,” she said with a smile and he gave her a small one in return. “Um, do you know who the hell Tybalt is?”

His smile widened and he nodded as he leaned over to help her. The teacher told them to knock it off but he insisted that they were trying to help each other complete the same homework. He even argued that it was more character building than just sitting in silence. He was damn lucky that he seemed to have some of that same charm that David had when it came to teachers. The teacher waved them away, letting them continue to work together.

She finished her homework a lot faster than she would have without him. And she understood the story a little better than she had coming in to detention. She was reminded then that that was where they were and as she looked at Killian, with his red ears and his shy smile and hunched shoulders and his dumb glasses, she had to ask.

“What did you do to get in here?” His smile faltered just a tad. He scratched behind his ear nervously.

“I, um, I punched Eric.”

“You what?” she demanded, loud enough that the teacher glared. Of all the things she’d expected - that was not one of them.

“He was picking on Belle. He threw her book in the snow and made fun of her for liking to read - I mean, who the hell makes fun of someone for reading?”

Emma felt her lips curling up a bit at his incredulous tone. “What, is Belle your girlfriend or something,” she teased. He frowned at her, looking confused.

“No,” he said. “She’s with that strange Scottish exchange student who’s name I can’t pronounce. But she’s a person and she’s sweet and Eric is an asshole and well, Belle is only about yea big,” he said, bringing his thumb and index finger close together. “I couldn’t do nothing,” he insisted. Emma laughed.

Two things changed that day. One, Emma understood Shakespeare for the first (and last) time in her life. And two, she decided to make Killian Jones her friend.

They were inseparable after that. At school they spent almost all of their time together. In class they sat next to each other, they chatted in the halls between bells, they ate lunch together, and Killian ate dinner at their house regularly. Emma learned fairly quickly that his own home wasn’t a place he liked to be when he could avoid it.

His mother had died when he was young and his father had raised him and his brother for a few years but finally decided that he couldn’t handle raising his sons on his own so when Killian’s brother went off to university, he had sent him to live with his aunt Cora in Boston. She was, in Killian’s own words, not a very nice woman.

It was then that Emma realised how similar she and Killian were. They’d both been abandoned and left behind by the people who were supposed to care about them more than anyone. His father had sent him away. Her parents had abandoned her by the side of the road. Both their parents had chosen to give them up. And so she invited him for dinner, because Ruth and David were the best thing that had ever happened to her and she thought he could use a little bit of the Nolans in his life.

He and David got along like a house on fire. She was surprised considering how David was such a jock, and Killian revealed dorkier and dorkier interests with every day that she knew him. But they were similar, she could see that, in their friendliness and openness and their humor. Killian told her that David reminded him of his brother and that made him miss him less.

David also quickly became the bane of her existence, insisting that she and Killian were secretly in love with each other and getting on her case to just admit it already so that they could get married and have lots of babies like they both clearly wanted. Emma usually punched him for that.

She and Killian were friends. That was all. She’d had few real friends in her life and she wasn’t going to screw this one up by developing feelings for him. No matter how cute he looked when his hair fell onto his forehead despite his best efforts to push it back. No matter how much he made her laugh or how much she enjoyed when they watched a movie late on the weekend and he let her fall asleep with her head in his lap. No matter how she thought he looked kind of hot when he got mad every time she beat him at Scrabble - which was all the time. They were friends.

Emma had tried love once. She was sixteen, just when Ruth and David had first taken her in. There had been a guy. He had been in one of her group homes a while back, before he aged out and they had stayed in touch. They’d reunited when they found themselves both in the same city.

He was older but she didn’t think that mattered. What was five years when they’d lived so many of the same experiences? Ruth hadn’t approved of the situation but she’d stayed mostly quiet about it - their relationship not strong enough for her to impose her views yet.

She’d thought Neal was the love of her life. But then, she’d had a pregnancy scare and he’d run away faster than a bat outta hell. She’d never heard from him since. She hadn’t been pregnant, thank god. She was not ready to be a mother. But to see how little she meant to him, how despite all his pretty words and promises he had left her so easily the second he was faced with her being in his life forever… it had hurt. It had destroyed her, really. So she figured love wasn’t really worth it in the end.

She’d met Killian less than a year later and at first she’d hated him because that easy charisma and confidence and air of a damaged soul had reminded her so strongly of Neal that she’d headed for the hills. But after she’d gotten to know him she realised how different they were, and so she did love him - not in that way, maybe in that way- but in the way she loved David. She trusted him and liked being around him.

He was her friend - even if she had had that weird dream about him one time… several times… too many times. It wasn’t her fault that she thought about him when she woke up and before she went to sleep. He was usually texting her at that time - what else could she think about? They were friends. He was her best friend and he had been for nearly a year when everything changed.

“I um, I got in,” he told her when they were sitting at the kitchen table one weekend near the end of their senior year. They’d decided to open their letters together. Emma had applied to a few colleges nearby and the local community college. She had her sights set on becoming a police officer or a social worker. She wasn’t sure which yet. Killian wanted to be an English professor. He’d told her so one of the first days they’d hung out. She’d called him a nerd but gave him credit for at least finding a way to make money off of it.

“Got in where?” she asked. She’d missed which envelope he’d opened. He had a lot - they were all the big envelopes too.

“Oxford,” he said, his eyes wide in disbelief and amazement.

“Holy shit, Killian!” she shouted, standing up and throwing her arms around him, nearly knocking him right off his chair. “That’s amazing! Isn’t that where your brother studies? That’s an amazing school! Oh my god, professor Jones here you come!”

She was beaming, so proud of him, so happy for him. She knew this was his dream school. But there was something off. He didn’t look as thrilled as she expected him to. Maybe it was just shock but she thought he could at least smile about it.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, nudging his shoulder. “I thought this was what you wanted?”

“It is - sort of. It’s just…”

“Just what?”

“It’s in England,” he said and for the first time since he’d opened that letter it hit her. Oh. Oh. That meant… that meant he’d be leaving. Moving hundreds of miles away.

“I don’t have to go there,” he said, giving her an awkward, embarrassed smile. “I got into Harvard too.”

“You what?” she practically screamed. She punched his arm. “You weren’t supposed to open letters without me!”

“It was Harvard, Emma,” he deadpanned and she couldn’t really be mad at him. She wouldn’t have been able to wait either.

“Where do you want to go?” she asked and he looked at her hesitantly. She tried not to think about the way her heart was racing in her chest. Or about how blue his eyes were. Or about how she might not get to see them every day if he went to Oxford.

“I don’t know,” he started and she knew he was lying.

“Yes you do.” He looked away, not meeting her eye. “Killian, I know you hate it here,” he opened his mouth to protest but she cut him off. “I know you like me and David and Belle and some of the others but… I know you miss home. I know you miss your brother. I also know it’s the better program because you’ve told me so. Multiple times.” She held her breath for a moment, surprised at how much it hurt to encourage him to follow his dream. “Oxford is everything you’ve ever wanted.”

“Not everything,” he said and she tried to meet his eye. He wouldn’t look at her.

“What do you mean? What’s missing.”

“You,” he answered, finally looking at her and her breath caught in her throat. Not just at his words, but at the way he was looking at her, like he’d been holding something back a long time and now the floodgates had opened and it was rushing out, plain on his face. “Oxford doesn’t have you,” he said.

“If I stay here,” he continued, “we could go to school in the same city. We could keep hanging out between classes and on the weekends - we could even get a flat together!” he said a little excitedly and Emma’s chest hurt because she wanted all of those things, so badly. But she couldn’t have them. She couldn’t let him choose her over his future. They were friends. They were seventeen. He would regret it and resent her for the rest of his life.

“But Oxford is your dream, everything you said you wanted,” she reminded him. “Oxford is where your family is, your brother and your old friends.” Her argument sounded weak to her own ears.

“Maybe I have other dreams, other things I want more,” he said, looking at her that way again. It scared her.

“What dreams,” she asked, barely whispering.

“Emma,” he said, taking her hand and her heart started racing. “Emma you have to know, there’s no way you couldn’t. The whole school knows, your brother knows.” Her breath was coming quickly now, all of her senses on high alert and her blood rushing in her ears as he leaned in.

He pressed his lips to hers, tentatively, nervously, but with a passion that Killian always had for anything he did, anything he cared about. She shouldn’t let him kiss her, she thought. She couldn’t. She couldn’t because she wanted him to and if she wanted that then she had to admit to everything she wanted, to how much she wanted him.

Of course she knew. She’d always known and… he knew too. But this was his life. His future. She couldn't let him throw it away for her. She loved him, regardless of which way, and so she had to let him go. So she did let him kiss her, for a moment, let her lips slide over his own, let herself enjoy how natural it felt, how right it felt - because she knew she’d never get to again. She pulled away first.

“Killian -” she started and he must have heard it in her voice because he raised his hand, cupped her cheek.

“No,” he said, pressing his forehead to hers. His words were frantic, desperate, like he was trying to hold on to something he knew was slipping away. “I love you, Emma. Ask me not to go. Ask me to stay.”

She couldn’t. She couldn’t ask him that. It was selfish and she couldn’t let him give up his dreams for her. She wasn’t worth it. She knew he wouldn’t listen, wouldn’t let her convince him to leave just like that. She’d have to hurt him - for his own sake. And it would hurt her just as much.

“I can’t,” she said and she felt his hand tighten slightly in her hair. She pulled back. “Killian. Don’t stay for me. Whatever it is you feel for me… I don’t,” she lied. “I’m sorry. But you can’t stay in Boston for me. Not if you’re staying because you hope something will happen because… it’s never going to happen.”

She felt him tense. His hand still in her hair, her hand still clasped in his. Then he pulled back all at once, looked down, and then back at her. He was hurt, but there was guilt there too.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “Emma, I shouldn’t have…”

“It’s fine.”

“Will you still be my friend?” he asked. “Even after…”

“Yes,” she promised.

“You really want me to go?” he asked. She nodded, hoped he didn’t see the tears she was struggling to hold off.

“Yeah. I really want you to go,” she said.

When Killian went home that night, earlier than usual, Emma let herself cry.

Killian left in the summer. Their goodbye was awkward, as had most of their interactions been since his confession. They’d tried not to make it awkward, to go back to how they’d been but now he had this huge vulnerability hanging between them and she had this huge lie hanging between them. It tore at the fabric that made them what they were, that made their friendship what it had been. It stained it.

“Keep in touch,” she said as she hugged him outside his aunt’s house, the cab waiting behind them.

“Aye,” he promised. He got in the cab and David’s arm was around her suddenly.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Fine,” she lied again. She was getting good at it.

***

They were still sort of friends, for the first year they kept in touch - really made an effort. Killian told her about the residence and the people he had met and his professors and Emma told him about her forensics courses. She’d decided on becoming a police officer - but she wanted to be a detective. David was in the same program. It was nice to do it with someone else.

But slowly, unavoidably, life got in the way. The phone calls were few and farther between, he didn’t have the money to go to Boston for Thanksgiving and she didn’t have the money to go to England for Christmas. Plans were broken, texts went unanswered, new friends were made, new interests developed and slowly, they drifted.

It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It was just one of those sad, unavoidable realities of life. Only, he and David still talked, still texted and emailed and spoke on the phone. So maybe it wasn’t so unavoidable. Maybe they’d both needed it.

She still had him on Facebook, still checked in on his profile despite the years that passed, trying to stay aware of the things that were happening in his life. She learned about his brother’s death from David. She sent him a card with her condolences but she didn’t go to the funeral. It had been three years since he left, two since they’d spoken. He probably wouldn’t have wanted her there anyway. He hadn’t come down for David and Mary Margaret’s wedding a year later, despite having known both of them since high school. He’d had exams and had sent his apologies and a gift by mail.

She saw online that he was in a long-term relationship, someone called Milah, a pretty dark haired woman who looked a few years older than him, a professor at his school she discovered after a little bit of snooping. He was with her for two years during which Emma was accosted with pictures of the two of them, until finally, one day they just stopped. She wondered what had happened there.

She smiled when she learned that he got his PhD. He’d posted a picture of himself with a beer in one hand and his diploma in the other. He’d captioned it ‘that’s DOCTOR Killian Jones to you’. She hit the like button. He changed his job status to ‘employed’ at one of the smaller nearby colleges shortly after and she was proud of him. He’d done it. He’d gotten everything he wanted. It had taken ten years, but he was exactly who he’d hoped to be.

So was she. She had made detective a few years ago, alongside David. They were even allowed to be partners since technically they weren’t related. She was happy, she had a job she loved, a nice apartment that was all her own, good friends, family… but she still checked his Facebook. She still spent evenings sometimes with a glass of wine looking up the boy who had told her he loved her when she was seventeen.

She and David were sitting in their patrol car, staking out a coffee shop of all places that they’d been told their perp liked to use to make his drops, when he told her Killian was moving back.

“What?” she demanded, her voice practically squeaking.

“He got a job at Harvard,” David said dismissively, as though he hadn’t just turned her world upside down. “He’s got a one year teaching contract. I guess they liked the idea of a Brit teaching British lit,” he smirked a little at his own joke.

Emma was reeling. She wasn’t prepared for this. She didn’t know how to handle the guy that she’d loved in high school and then stalked on Facebook for ten years suddenly coming back into her life.

“You okay?” David asked, looking at her strangely.

“Fine,” she said quickly and he rolled his eyes, not buying it.

“Whatever,” he said, picking his battles. “We’re having a party at our house to welcome him home,” he told her. “You should come.” Emma forgot sometimes that David and Killian were still friends, even after all these years. He and Mary Margaret had even taken the time to visit him when they’d gone to Europe for their anniversary last year.

“Maybe,” she said dismissively.

“He still asks about you, you know,” David said after a moment. Emma stayed silent, pretending to look through her binoculars at the front door of the cafe. Pretending her heart wasn’t racing in her chest at the idea of seeing the man whose heart she’d broken a decade ago.

She’d debated not going to the party. Had walked to her front door and back into her kitchen a few times, had hesitated at her car, but she’d finally told herself to snap out of it. It had been ten years ago. They’d been teenagers. He was surely over it by now and she should be too. So she went.

She hadn’t been prepared. She thought she was but when she walked in and saw him standing with David and Mary Margaret, smiling at something one of them was saying… it was brutal. It was brutal because he was different. She’d expected him to be different of course, but not like this.

His smile didn’t reach his eyes. He looked sadder and older. He held himself more confidently than he had in high school, but something about it told her it was a facade. Maybe she just knew him, she thought. But she didn’t anymore, did she, she was reminded. Her heart stopped when he looked over, met her eyes. He smiled a little but it wasn’t the easy smile she’d loved so much. He raised his bottle at her and she gave an awkward wave.

“Long time no see, stranger,” he said later, coming up behind her to say hello and honestly scaring the absolute shit out of her.

“Jesus, Killian,” she said, hand to her chest. “Don’t you know not to sneak up on a cop like that?”

He smiled, that teasing smile she remembered. “I think I could take David if we’re honest.” She laughed. “I heard you made detective,” he said. “Congratulations.”

“Thanks. I hear you’re finally Professor Jones.”

“Aye. It seems we both got what we wanted in the end,” he said and there was a bit of sadness in the way he said it, the kind that she could tell was unintentional.

“So,” she started awkwardly when the silence dragged on. “How have you been?”

“Good, good,” he said. “You?” This was brutal. They continued the small talk for a while. She missed how easy things used to be between them. She missed all the stupid, fun things they did when they were kids and they didn’t have all this baggage hanging between them.

“You know what I miss?” she said out loud and he raised a brow at her.

“No, Swan, what do you miss?”

“I miss when we used to steal Ruth’s whiskey and climb up onto the roof and drink it there,” she smiled, remembering how many long, slightly drunken conversations they’d had as kids on the roof of Ruth’s house.

Killian smiled, fondly and then a little mischievously. He leaned in a little and Emma couldn’t help but notice the way his face had changed. His jaw was sharper, some of the roundness of his cheeks having faded with age, and he’d grown into his nose. He was sporting a short beard now too, something he’d always wanted to complete his professor look but hadn’t been able to grow. He dressed better too, no more jeans and band tshirts. Now he wore… well, jeans and a tshirt but nicer ones with a jacket and boots instead of converse. It was pretty unfair, Emma thought, that he'd gotten better looking with age. He’d been good-looking enough to begin with.

“I think I spy a bottle of whiskey in the kitchen there,” he hinted and Emma smirked.

“This place does have a roof,” she said, matching his tone.

“I’ll get the bottle, you distract Dave,” he said, winking - well, trying to. He’d never mastered that one and it made her smile a bit to see that some things hadn’t changed.

They successfully managed to steal the bottle and hurry their way up to the guest room that Emma knew had a window they could walk out onto the roof from. They sat there, knees pulled up, passing the bottle between them as they looked out at the slowly darkening sky. Emma let the liquor warm her, let it make her a little looser, a little braver.

“How are you really, Killian?” she asked eventually. He sighed, reaching for the bottle and taking a sip.

“Tired,” he said. “It’s been a rough few years.”

“I saw, about your brother,” she said. “I’m sorry.”

He nodded. “Thank you. I’ve learned to live with it.”

“There was a woman too,” she said, not quick enough to catch the words before they slipped out. He raised an eyebrow at her teasingly.

“Been stalking my facebook, have you, Swan?”

She shrugged, deciding to be honest. “Only a little.” He looked surprised at her confession, a small smile breaking out on his face.

“Aye, there was a woman,” he said and she wanted to roll her eyes at the fact that he sounded like some old dandy poet, lamenting over a lost love. “Milah. She went back to her husband.” Emma’s eyes shot up to her hairline. Husband? Wow. That was not what she’d expected. “There was a child involved,” he said, not turning to see her surprised look. “It was for the best.”

He didn’t sound like he totally believed what he said, but he sounded like he’d made peace with it. Emma felt for him. His life had continued on the way it had been when they met. He’d lost more people, been left behind by more people he cared about, loved. She’d managed to avoid that. But she hadn’t let herself love anyone new. Not since him.

“And what about you?” he asked, turning to hand her back the bottle. “What great loves have you lived and lost? Or is there a great love now?” he asked with a cheeky smile. She laughed.

“Nah, not for me,” she said. “My love affairs usually only last until the next morning.” He huffed out a laugh as she took another drink from the bottle.

“Ah, you’ll find it someday,” he said. “One day there will be a man that you can’t dream of living without and that one will last a long time.”

“Two nights?” she joked and he laughed again. His laugh was the same, she thought with a small smile.

“Aye, two nights.”

They sat in silence for a while, continuing to share the bottle and Emma decided to blame that for what she said next. “I’ve missed you,” she told him and he turned his head to face her, away from the stars they’d been gazing up at.

“I’ve missed you too, Swan,” he told her. He lay back, stretched his arm out and she took the invitation, snuggled up next to him like they had when they were teenagers watching scary movies and she lay her head on his shoulder.

They stayed out there for another hour before David came to find them, scolding Killian for sneaking out of his own party. But he smiled at them as they climbed back through the window and Emma knew he was happy they’d found their way back to each other - that they were finding their way back to the friendship she’d once valued more than anything.

The next night, Emma invited him out for a drink with her and some of her friends from college. He’d made a comment about going out two nights in a row and she’d mocked him for being an old man - ‘I’m sorry, has it been ten years or fifty since we last saw each other?’ - and he agreed to join her.

Emma was surprised, tough not really, at how well he fit in with her friends. They all loved him, loved his stories from teaching and the fact that he had dirt on Emma from before any of them knew her. He and Will and Robin hit it off immediately and she figured it was probably a brit thing. They spent over an hour talking about soccer.

He fit in well here. Emma tried not to think about the fact that he fit so well into her life. Or about how much she liked that he fit there, how much she’d missed having him there. She also, really tried to ignore the way that his shirt clung to his biceps. He hadn’t had those in high school. It was difficult when Ruby seemed so intent on pointing it out. Ruby was being herself, pretending to be more salacious than she really was for a laugh, making comments about how she could just spread him on a cracker, when she looked at Emma and her face changed.

“Oh,” she said and Emma didn’t like the knowing tone of her voice.

“What?” Emma asked, realising that her arms were crossed over her chest. She let them fall, tried to strike a more casual pose.

“I didn’t realise… you like him,” she said with a sly smile. Emma scoffed.

“We’re friends,” she said flatly.

“Mhm,” Ruby smirked. “You don’t look at me like that,” she pointed out. “Or Will, or Robin, or even Graham.”

“Shut up,” Emma said, crossing her arms again as Killian looked over and she accidentally, automatically smiled at him. Ruby only laughed.

They were friends. They’d only just started being friends again. She wasn’t going to ruin it now. She’d been the one to ensure that they would always, only be friends. ‘It’s never going to happen’, she’d told him. She’d made her bed. Now she had to lie in it - alone.

She still couldn’t help wondering though if he still kissed the same way. She’d only kissed him once but she’d had yet to have another that lived up to it. And he’d been a teenager then, she was pretty sure she was the second girl he’d ever kissed. She wondered what it would be like now.

She pushed the thought away. She’d thrown that possibility out the window a long time ago. She’d done it for his own good. And look who he was now, a professor, he had a goddamn PhD. He’d gotten everything he wanted. So why did he look so sad most of the time? Why was she so sad most of the time? She hadn’t noticed that she was before - it had only been since he came back and she had become aware of the gaping hole where something had been missing from her life.

Having him back helped a bit. Like a bandaid over an open wound. She just hoped that the awkwardness would fade and they would find their way back to the friendship she had mourned for so long, had never really gotten over. She hoped he would let her earn it back. She looked at him laughing at something Robin said and she realised that regardless of time, her life was a little better with him in it.

The awkwardness did fade. It wasn’t instant and it wasn’t necessarily easy - there was a lot between them, a lot of years and disappointments and broken trust, but soon, they found their way back to what they’d had as kids. It wasn’t long before they were spending evenings in each other's apartments, curling up on the couch and watching bad movies. She found herself smiling a lot throughout the day when he would text her a funny message or a stupid meme.

He was there for Christmas, only the second they’d gotten to celebrate together. They’d both spent the night at David and Mary Margaret’s and Emma had only been disappointed for a second that there were two guest rooms. She’d been looking forward to staying up late talking with him and laughing… and flirting. She’d noticed that there had been a bit more flirting, more than there used to be. On second thought, having to share a bed might not have been a good thing. Not if she wanted to keep him as a friend. She bought him a tweed jacket with leather patches on the shoulders that year. It was meant to be a joke but he’d worn it every day for a month.

He was there for New Years and Emma felt her heart skip a beat when he kissed her at midnight. It was a small thing, a peck on the lips, barely a second, and he’d smiled at her in a way that made her feel that she shouldn’t read into it - no matter how much she wanted to. It was just a European thing, she insisted, weird boundaries.

There had been a moment, once, when they’d been sitting on her couch in her apartment, watching another terrible movie. Nothing had happened, nothing specifically, but suddenly she found herself looking at him and he was watching her too, something heavy hanging in the air between them.

Their hands were close and he moved his little finger, brushed it over hers and it made her breath stop. It was ridiculous, considering her legs were thrown over his and they were already sitting so close, but her breath stopped anyway. It was the way he was looking at her, the uncertainty and the affection and just a tiny bit of longing - there was no other word for it. She recognized it because she’d felt it every day since he’d come home - every day since he’d left ten years ago.

His fingers had continued, collecting more of hers and slowly intertwining them. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted him to kiss her. She was pretty sure that he would for a moment. He held their hands up between them, looked at them and then at her, pulled her a little closer. And then a loud noise had come from the TV and he’d jumped, dropping her hands and scratching at his ear. They didn’t bring it up again.

He was there for St Patty’s Day and Easter and the Fourth of July and birthdays, and before she knew it a year had passed. Well, nearly a year, eleven months to be exact. She knew that because it was August and he was complaining about having to go back to teaching the ‘little entitled shit’s’ as he called them.

“Weren't you one of those students a few years ago?” she reminded him, flicking at his ear as she walked around him into her kitchen to grab them a snack. He was sitting on her sofa a few feet away. Her apartment was small, but it was cozy.

“I was a little shit,” he allowed, batting at her hand. “But I was never entitled. It’s the entiledness that really gets to me.”

“I don’t think that’s a word,” she taunted, as she put the popcorn in the microwave and turned it on.

He turned, throwing his arm over the back of the couch and looking over his shoulder at her. “You really want to question an English Literature professor?”

“Being a professor doesn’t mean you get to make up words,” she told him. “Besides, I still beat you in Scrabble so I’m pretty sure I’m the expert.”

He scoffed, hopping over the back of the couch and joining her in the kitchen. “Scrabble is a game of luck, nothing more,” he told her. “You can’t make words if you don’t get the right letters.”

“Sounds like something a loser would say,” she shrugged. He looked at her in shock and Emma saw the glint in his eye a second before he moved. “Don’t,” she tried to warn him but he was too fast. He grabbed her and the idiot started tickling her, actually tickling her like he was seven years old.

“Admit I have a superior mastery of the English language,” he demanded. She shrieked as she laughed, her sides burning, cursing him. He had her trapped against his body, his arm wrapped around her waist, pinning her back to his chest.

“Never!” she saw her opportunity and she took it. She grabbed his arm and spun him around, managed to pin him against the fridge, her arm braced against his chest, holding one of his wrists, she held the other down at his side.

“Woah,” he said, eyes wide.

“I keep telling you not to mess with cops,” she pointed out.

“That was kind of hot,” he admitted, looking more impressed than turned on really. But that was enough for Emma to realise that she had him pushed up against the fridge, her whole body pressed to his. She could feel her face warming, could feel all of her skin warming where she touched his. Oh. She saw it in his eyes when he noticed too.

She let him go, moved to step back but he caught her, putting his hand on her lower back and pulling her back in. Her heart rate picked up as he pressed her against him, that look in his eyes he’d had that night on her couch back again. He licked his bottom lip and Emma’s eyes darted down to it immediately.

She saw the way his expression changed a little when she did, curiosity there as he cocked his head, looking her over. He seemed unable to settle on a single part of her face until he stopped at her lips. His own parted, his chin tilting slightly, drawing closer and she couldn’t think of anything except the heat of him against her and her heart running a marathon in her chest. She could feel his breath on her face and that he looked so damn handsome and she just really, really wanted him to kiss her.

The microwave beeped and Emma cursed the shitty timing that seemed to keep ripping them apart anytime she was given the smallest bit of hope that there could be something more, that they could be something more. Because that was what she wanted. She’d stopped denying it that night on her couch.

She wanted Killian. She loved Killian. She had since she was seventeen years old. She’d thought it would go away, had almost believed it had at one point. But then he’d come back into her life and that part of her that had been on mute, on pause but never truly gone had reared its head, made sure she knew that she was still, completely and hopelessly in love with the boy she’d met in detention.

Killian released her, cleared his throat and she stepped back. She held back her sigh, her disappointment. She couldn’t tell him. Not now. Not after all they went through, not now that they were back to who they’d been. She’d turned him down ten years ago. She’d broken his heart. To tell him now that she loved him, that she’d always loved him... She feared his reaction, feared his rejection.

“I have to tell you something.” He said to her back. She was pouring popcorn into a bowl.

“If it’s that you don’t want Milkduds in your popcorn you’re shit outta luck,” she said, trying to lighten the heavy mood between them.

“No, well, yes, but that’s not what I wanted to tell you.” She turned around, recognizing the serious tone of his voice. She leaned back against the counter, waiting for him to say whatever he needed to say. “I’ve been offered a job,” he told her.

“Killian that’s amazing!” she started but he stopped her.

“It’s at Oxford.” She felt her heart drop into her stomach. No. Not again. She’d only just gotten him back. “A former professor of mine, Nemo, he pulled some strings when one of the faculty announced her retirement. He says the job is mine if I can get there for the fall semester.”

It took Emma a moment to speak, trying to process what he was saying, trying to cope with the way it was ripping out her heart. “What about Harvard?” she asked, a little hopefully.

He scratched that spot behind his ear like he always did when he was nervous. “That position is still up in the air. They’re still reviewing my candidacy.”

She didn’t say anything, not for a long time. She couldn’t think of what to say. She felt like she was seventeen again, having the exact same conversation they’d had then. Please don’t go, she wanted to beg. Don’t leave. Stay here with me. Be with me. Choose me. But he’d chosen her once before. He’d chosen her and she’d practically thrown it back in his face.

“It’s a pretty great opportunity,” he continued. “Rare too. It usually takes years to get a position like that.” She could hear him speaking, was aware that he was talking to her, but she couldn’t hear him over the thoughts that were rolling around in her head. She couldn’t lose him again. Not like last time. Don’t go. Don’t go. Don’t go.

“The English program there is renowned and-”

“Don’t go.”

He froze. “What?”

Shit. Shit, she’d said it out loud. He was looking at her with disbelief and shock and maybe a tiny bit of hope, but maybe she’d imagined that. Well, it was too late now to take it back.

“Don’t go,” she repeated, stronger this time. She watched the emotions playing over his face, so many that she couldn’t track all of them. But the last one was anger, a desperate kind.

“What do you mean don’t go?” he reeled on her. “How - How can you ask me that? After all these years?”

“I know,” she said, hanging her head. “I’m sorry but I just,” she took a deep breath. “I let you leave once and it was the worst mistake I ever made. I was in love with you and when you left I lost you and... Don’t go.” His eyes widened in shock, his jaw dropping. If this moment hadn’t been so serious it would have been almost comical.

“You were in love with me?” he demanded, disbelief clear in his voice. He stepped forward. “Why didn’t you tell me that ten years ago? Why did you push me away?” His voice cracked a little. “I was in love with you, Emma. I’d have done anything for you and you - You broke my heart.”

“I know,” she could feel tears burning her eyes. “I thought it was the right thing to do. I thought that if you stayed you’d resent me, that you’d hate me eventually. I wanted you to get everything you wanted.”

“You were what I wanted!” he practically shouted at her. She flinched a little. “I wanted to be with you but you turned me down. And then you cut me out of your life.”

“I didn’t-”

“You did, Emma. You stopped answering my calls, my texts, my emails. You didn’t come to the funeral…” She hung her head again. “And now, now we’re finally speaking again, finally back in each other’s lives, finally friends again and now you say you loved me? Now you ask me to stay?”

“Are you not anymore?” she asked and he looked at her in confusion. “In love with me," she clarified. She shouldn’t be asking him. She knew she wouldn’t like the answer. Just because her feelings hadn’t changed in ten years didn’t mean his wouldn’t. He tensed, stood up straighter.

“Are you?” he demanded.

Emma bit her lip. She was. She was as in love with him now as she was at seventeen but it was different now. She was an adult, she understood the difference between love and infatuation, knew how they were different. Her love had grown from missing him for a decade, had grown more from being with him this last year. It was all consuming, all she thought about. All she wanted was him, if he turned her down now… she didn’t know if she’d recover.

“Emma, how can you ask me to stay if you can’t even tell me how you feel? What are you asking me to stay for?” She didn’t have an answer. She just stared at her feet. He waited for a while, and she heard as his breath slowed and became a heavy sigh. “I should go,” he said, walking back over to the couch to grab his jacket.

He was at the door when the panic seized her. The dread and the fear that he was leaving, that he was walking out of her life again, that it was her fault again, that she would surely lose him for good this time, overwhelmed her, reared its head and took over. What are you asking me to stay for? he’d asked. He hadn’t answered her question, hadn’t told her he didn’t love her. He’d just wanted a reason. She’d give him a reason if it meant he would stay. He’d been the one to put his heart on the line last time. Now it was her turn.

“Don’t go,” she said again and he stopped with his hand on the doorknob. “Don’t go. Don’t leave the apartment. Don’t go back to England. Don’t leave again. Please,” she begged.

He didn’t turn around but she heard him speak. “Why not?”

“Because I love you,” she nearly shouted at him. “Okay? I’ve been in love with you since I was seventeen and I thought I could get over it but I can’t. I lost you once and I can’t lose you again so please,” she paused, a small sob leaving her. He turned around finally, walked back over to where she still stood against the counter.

“Please just don’t go,” she said again, quieter this time. “I should have said it then but I’m saying it now. I’m being selfish and asking you to pass on your amazing opportunity. I’m asking you to choose me and be with me instead.”

He took her chin between his thumb and his finger dragged her gaze up from where it had been staring at her feet, met her eyes and her heart jumped at the softness there, the anger from earlier gone. “I’ll stay,” he said and she thought her knees would give out with the force of the relief, the hope hitting her all at once.

“What about your job?” she said hesitantly. Shut up, Emma. You got what you wanted. But she still cared - about his success and his dreams, even as she asked him to give them up.

“Fuck my job,” he said before his hand moved to her cheek and he slid his mouth over hers. Emma wanted to cry as she felt his lips move over her own. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close, slanting his mouth over hers and she opened beneath him, let him explore her with lips and tongue, and his hands on her body.

Her hands came up around his neck, tangling in his hair and dragging him closer, pressing herself against him until here was no room left between them at all. He backed her against the counter and she didn’t care even as she felt the hard ridge digging into her back. He groaned when she rolled her hips against the hard ridge digging into her belly.

“Wait, wait,” he said, breath heavy and ragged as he pulled his lips away from hers.

“What?” she asked, suddenly nervous. That had been the best moment in her entire life and now she feared it would come crashing down, that he’d changed his mind.

“I forgot to tell you that I love you too,” he said, sounding panicked. She looked at him in disbelief and in that moment he was exactly the boy she’d fallen in love with, awkward and sweet and nervous and just so stupid for such a smart person. “I love you,” he said. “I have for a decade. It never stopped for me either.” Whatever quip she had planned died on her tongue at the sincerity in his voice and on his face.

She smiled before pulling his lips back to hers, standing on her tiptoes so that she could kiss him properly, the way she’d wanted to for ten years and hadn’t been able to. He kissed her back just as eagerly, lips and teeth and tongue driving her nearly as mad as his hands, which were everywhere at once, stoking the fire that had been burning inside of her since she’d pinned him against the fridge.

“You’ve gotten better at this,” she teased when they pulled back a moment to catch their breath. He gave her a truly wicked grin.

“I’ve gotten better at a great many things,” he promised, and she knew where he was going with it, was definitely on board with his plan… but she couldn’t help herself.

“Not Scrabble…”

He bent down then, grabbing her around the knees and hoisting her up over his shoulder. She shrieked, laughing as he carried her the short distance to her bedroom, dropping her unceremoniously on the mattress. He was such a sore loser.

He looked at her for a moment, standing at the edge of the bed before leaning down over her, bracing his hands on either side of her head, and lowering his face to hers so their lips nearly brushed as he spoke.

“Not Scrabble,” he conceded before that smile came back. “But a great many things.”

#cs #captain swan #captain swan au #friends to lovers #cs au #cs fanfiction #captain swan fanfiction #captain swan fanfic #cs fanfic

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